I sat watching the TV with my brother. Some ugly dog walked across the screen. It wasn't thing ugly:
Or so ugly it was cute:
It wasn't a zombie:
And it wasn't Cerberus's cousin:
It was still hideous though--at least "a one" on the beauty scale. And I'm sure the the advertiser didn't make a dime off their product, just like when they used their own daughters to model.
I remember the dog looking more like this:
So, anyway, I know the details well because every one is practically tattooed on my brain. As we watched that stupid commercial, my brother decided to give me some devastating news.
"You were adopted, Elisa."
"What? Are you serious?"
"Dead serious. No one wants to tell you, but I figure it's time. You're old enough, you're almost twelve."
I nodded. Twelve was pretty old. I mean, when you're twelve, you can drive in four years. You can't play with Barbies. You can walk places alone.
I bathed in my own tears then, crying so hard.
"Yep," my brother finally said nodding. The commercial prepared to end, that's how fast it all happened. "You were adopted." He grinned again, pointing to the TV. "And that dog is your Mama."
On a side note, today we're leaving to a funeral. Cade's grandma died.
Have a great day. I'll check all your blogs when we get back.
Why are brothers so mean when they know we idolize them? My big brother (2 years older than me) used to go with me to Saturday afternoon movies. We loved horror films. He told me that the monsters came off the screen when the picture was over & into the theater. I would see "The End" & run outside. I wondered why the monsters never caught him!
ReplyDeleteOk so it was funny as usual and then you drop the death bomb ?!
ReplyDeleteWhat to say to that?
I guess I'll just give you my best wishes n have you guys in my prayers.
So sorry about Cade's grandmother.
ReplyDeleteDamn it someone always seems to beat me to post the first comment!
ReplyDeleteWhen I look it says zero and when it posts, im second!
Well I wanna be #1 !
That's my new goal......
was funny
ReplyDeletebut end was shocking never expected such a end of post
I honestly think it's in brothers' nature to be mean. I have two younger brothers and they were meant to me from time to time growing up. The youngest one (just turned 20) still is on occasion. Ugh! Boys! ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I was also surprised by the way you ended the post. A funny post and a serious ending? No way would this have passed as a story in one of the writing classes I took in college ;P
All I can say is What the hell E? I was a laughing away then you dropped that last line like a hurricane.
ReplyDeleteI may have to beat you senseless.
Ps That is a brothers job. If he were closer in age to you he would have tortured you even worse. I promise. ooooh that just reminded me of a brother story I have to write. Oh yeah.
Please let Cade know that all your readers feel for his grief.
ReplyDeleteI was in the convent when my two grandmothers died. I missed one funeral but got permission to go to the other. I'm wondering if Cade has other grandparents or if this is the end of that generation for him.
When that happens, a shift takes place in our thinking about our parents and ourselves. There's a letting go and a gathering in.
Please give Cade my best. Peace.
We just got back. Cade's grandma was the last one to pass away out of all of our grandparents
ReplyDelete. . . She really was a wonderful woman. We'll miss her so much.
Thanks for your kind thoughts.
Sorry about Grandma.
ReplyDeleteI think everyone's brother told them they were adopted. Except Tony's... they said their Mother found him in the dumpster behind their house. :)
Holy crap, I love your sense of humor. You've been added to my blog list. So sorry to hear about your Grandma, though.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, and I'm the oldest of ten kids, so one of my favorite pastimes was playing "I'm pretty sure you're adopted" with all the other kids. I'd follow it up with, "And I should know...I came first."
I remember it being a cow when I said that, a really ugly cow. How else can you explain that milky white skin of yours. Our mother IS Italian after all... But your first reaction was so priceless that it turned into an ongoing gag. Perhaps I am remembering a different instance with the cow. Watching realization that I was kidding dawn over your eleven year old mind was priceless, too good to let go of. I was just teasing my little sister, right? Or was I...?
ReplyDeleteI can see that once a brother always a brother uh? Sorry to hear about Cade's grandma, I'm sure he has great memories of her.
ReplyDeleteMy conscience is weighing on me, Elisa. All those years ago, when I said you were adopted, I was telling the truth. Your reaction was so dramatic at the time that I panicked. It wasn't my place to tell you anyway, so I did the only thing I could, I latched onto the first thing I saw and pretended I was making a joke. The whole family decided it should be a secret forever. But seeing your post today made me realize we were wrong. You deserve to know the truth of your origins. I think you're strong enough now and have the right to know. At first I didn't think I'd find her, your mother by blood that is, and then the most amazing thing happened. I found the following website. http://www.nihonink.com/
ReplyDeleteWhat a wicked wicked brother. Then again, that's brotherly love for ya'. My condolences to your family...I hope everyone's well.
ReplyDeleteAt least you had the opportunity to have good times with your brother too! My oldest brother was the biggest tease ever (even to the point of teasing his own kids!). I will never forget how he used to sit on our heads and fart, or the one time he was left in charge to babysit and locked all of the kids out of the house (5 of us). That doesn't sound so bad until you realize that we lived at the mouth of a small canyon with lots of coyotes and it was night time. We cried and cried and banged on doors and windows to get him to let us in but he just shut all the blinds and turned his music up really loud. Thank Heavens for nice neighbors!
ReplyDeleteSorry about Grandma! Much love to you and yours!