Thursday, April 12, 2012

Two hilarious side notes

Two funny things happened yesterday. 
Let me explain . . .

I know the last thing anyone wants to read, is about my boob problems--again.  But something happened.  No, I didn't get implants.  No, the miracle grow I've been stuffing in my bra didn't start working.  This crazy thing happened at the store.
    I went shopping at multiple places for a training bra--FOR MY DAUGHTER.  The first cashier asked if I was looking for myself--I didn't buy anything there.  She didn't mean it rude or anything (I hope).  It did make me giggle because when I got home and checked my blog stats, someone found my blog yesterday by searching "size A or boobs in training."  I'm not sure why this made me smile, but it did.  
    Maybe my boobs aren't really smaller than two mosquito bites.  Maybe they're just "in training."  After all, many people tell me that boobs either stretch like pancakes or magically grow with age.  This is gonna be great! I just know it.  Because I don't have an A minus any more.  Some google genius had it right all along--I'm still in training.


    So, since I'm putting everything out there, let me tell you about another thing that happened.  
     A man got VERY angry with me.  I had a bunch of groceries, and was so busy keeping the babies buckled, staying in line and putting my groceries on the conveyer, I failed to notice the man behind me or the fact that he only held one item.  "You should let me go first!" he accused, pointing at me.
   "Oh."  I stopped mid-smile and looked at him.  "Ummm.  Sure.  I guess.  It looks like you only have one item."
    "Yep.  You're a bright one, you are!"  He pushed past me and after the cashier frowned at Mr. Grump, she beamed in my direction as if she might save the moment.  "Elisa, your big book signing is this week.  Are you excited?"
    "Yeah.  Cade's even paying for me to have my hair done.  I'm getting it colored for the first time in years!  Plus, it'll be a break from the kids.  I don't even know if I'll sell anything, but as long as I get a huge coffee and a few hours of peace, it's gonna be golden!"
    She laughed.  "No joke.  That sounds great.  I hope you'll get a big turn-out."
    At this point The Grump turned to me.  "Signing?" he asked.
    The cashier piped in.  "Elisa's a local author.  You should read her book, The Golden Sky."
    I can't even tell you how funny this is to me, but the man's demeanor changed.  "An author?  Wow.  You know," he paused, "Maybe I should have let you go first.  Sure I only had one item, but you got those kids."  He scratched his chin before paying the cashier.  "A real author," he mumbled.  "When are you doing the signing?"
    "This Friday.  The thirteenth.  I'll be playing my violin and everything."  I winked and couldn't stop wondering if that cranky man would actually come to visit with me.  I bet he's hilarious when you get to know him.  Anyone who can turn on a dime, they're part shape-shifter and that's epic.

    Did anything out of the norm happen to you this week?  

For more info about my signing schedule, please go HERE