Sunday, June 26, 2011

Feeling Sad

    My ten year high school reunion was this summer.  Several months ago I got this cute little e-mail inviting me to join the alumni blog, submit a bio, send pictures.  I was super excited.
    I visited the blog, oohhed and aahhed over the pictures.  It was great seeing how people are doing.  Everyone wrote about their awesome education and their darling families.  They really were nicely done.  
   I decided I'd add my rendition.  How great would it be to submit a bio with some reality AND humor?  So,  I'm sure it wasn't the greatest thing ever, but I wrote from the heart.  

    Here's what I wrote:

    I'm a mother of five, I always say that even though one of my children passed away eight years ago. (But it would be mocking his memory if I didn't include him.) So, anyway, I spend most of my time taking care of four rambunctious kids who make life better than green ham and eggs. They're pretty darn fun, but despite that, after I had kids, my boobs shrunk, I've lost hair, but gained a greater sense of humor--thank God for that half full glass of water!
    When I'm not scavenging through the vents, which my son thinks are the best place to hide things, I'm sewing, playing my violin, or writing. What don't I do? Well that's easy, I don't sleep. There's too much going on. But that's how I like things anyway, because someday in the future I'll be a ninety-year-old. When grumpy nurses aren't helping me to the toilet, THEN I can sleep all day.
    But right now, I'm still in my twenties and by golly, I don't want to sleep my life away. So, we're taking it a day at a time. Enjoying the small things and happy to be alive. 

    Please check out my blog: 
and my business: (Which made the ebay pulse three consecutive years as one of the five largest custom sewing businesses in the world.) 

Here's the picture I included with my bio:
And the link to that silly blog:

    But something strange happened.
    More bios kept popping up on the alumni blog, more and more recently submitted, sometimes multiple bios a day, but mine never did.  A couple of my friends chalked it up to a flood of bios.  "Yours will show up soon.  Don't worry.  They've just received a ton." 
   But mine never did . . .

    It reminded me of high school again and why I graduated early.  I was taking a debate class.  We were supposed to hold a trial.  Everyone would play a part, either be a lawyer, a witness, a judge, be on the jury.  It was a huge part of our grade.  Well, the teacher selected me to be a witness.  I worked on my testimony for days.  I'd be a redneck farmer who like chewing ta-backy, and I'd seen the criminal leaving the scene of the crime!  But when the "court date" came, and we spent hours on the trial, the popular lawyer never called me to the stand and the teenage criminal got away!
    "I wasn't called," I told the teacher because I wanted a good grade.  He asked the popular girl to stay after school the next day and you know what she said?  
    "I thought she'd hurt the case because she's such a dork."
    Too bad for her, that I got the 'A' when the teacher read my testimony.  I still don't know how Miss Popularity did on the final grade, but legend has it that she got docked quite a few points.  

    So, the reunion reminded me of high school drama again.  I waited and waited.  They listed my blog among the alumni blogs (which showed they'd received my e-mail), but still no bio or business listing.
    Either someone's incompetence got in the way, their pride, or maybe the fact that I'd written about them in my blog memoir--my bemoir!  That did make me chuckle, thinking about Sarah or Poodle-face reading my blog.
    I sat, thinking about how much it upset me.  I normally don't get down.  I considered going to the reunion, giving them a real show.  Cade couldn't get off of work, but I could bring one of my sassy friends.  We'd wear push up bras and high-heeled boots!  I could spike that religious punch and fiddle my way to success.  It would have made an amazing blog, but instead I acted like a ball-less chicken and I just stayed home.

    I hate wallowing, and the whole thing chapped my butt, until I got a text from one of my friends.  Her message pulled my mind from snooty high school reunion planners.
    "I don't know how to tell you this, but my teenage daughter read an advance copy of your memoir about Zeke.  She found it on the table . . . and she posted a review on her blog.  Please don't be mad.  I never know what she'll say, but I'm a little worried.  She's very honest with her opinions.  I can't get home yet, but I'm sooo worried.  Please don't be mad."
    My hand shook as I went to her daughter's blog.  The thing with my memoir is that it's about Zeke.  It's actually my journal from when I was nineteen.  I've edited it and revised it a bit, but it's real and raw.  Every tear, every laugh, every moment--they happened and it's like ripping open my ribcage and seeing into my soul.  
    I wasn't sure I could handle a negative review just then--not one about my son who died.  I know criticism is a part of life, but I didn't want to be sad anymore that day, especially after the reunion thing.  
   Anyway, I read her post and cried.  
    It was one of THE NICEST, KINDEST THINGS anyone has said about my book.  I am so thankful because her words came at the perfect time.  I just had to say, "Thank you, Marshelle!  You took a hard day and made it into a wonderful one!  I'll never forget your sweet post, or how amazing you are."

    Here's the link to her review.  She's such a doll!   

My Hero....

   So, I didn't spike any punch and I didn't wear heels.  I'll have to do all that at my twenty year!  I'll be looking forward to that madness.  
    But I guess the real point of this post, is how awesome life is!  It's just amazing how you can have a terrible day, but somehow God is always there, looking out for you.  He's waiting with open arms, just like He said He would be!