Tuesday, November 22, 2011

An Online Family

    Check my tabs to buy my book, enter the giveaway or see the blogfest posts.

   Onto today's post:

    Yesterday I got a package in the mail.  I'd talked with Fishducky a few days before.  She said, "I'm sending something to you.  Open the package when you're alone and then follow the instructions."  
    That sounded epic!
    So, when I saw the package yesterday, I felt like a spy.  But I had instructions to open that thing alone--my kids couldn't see it! 
    "Look over there," I screamed and pointed, using the oldest trick in the book.  All of my children looked out the window as I snatched the package from the porch and tip-toed up the stairs.  I shut my bedroom door and locked it after that.
    Life seemed so bright!  I had a package.  Plus, I don't think I've ever been in a room alone, not really.  Usually someone's hanging on my leg, or trying to wipe snot on me.  I'm changing diapers or cleaning milk off the floor. 
    I'm not complaining--not really--I'm just saying that sometimes change is nice, and my room seemed awfully quiet.
    So with shaky hands, I opened the package, and pulled out a note.  This is what I read:

Dear Elisa-

Please follow these step by step instructions:

1-There are 7 duck nose masks--one for each of your kids, plus one for Mr. P & one each for you & Melynda.  Give everyone a nose.

    I stopped right there.  I mean seriously--Fishducky is awesome.  Melynda (from Crazy world) and I are always saying that she's our kind of duck!
    I smiled and pulled a sack out of the package.  Yes indeed, there were 7 duck nose masks.  
    So, I read on:

2-Put all the other (5) animal noses on a table.  Tell the kids Fishducky said: EVERYONE PICK YOUR NOSE!!


    I called Melynda, and she brought Mr. P right over.  I handed them each a duck nose mask and this is what they looked like:

Melynda and I--ducks in training.

    I put all the other noses in a sack on the coffee table.  That's when the urge to tell a story overtook me.  
   Fine, I'll admit it; I've gotten good at B.S.ing my children.  
    "Once upon a time," I said.  "There was a man who was born without a nose."
    You should have seen Melynda's face.  That woman is A DOLL!  I bet she was thinking, "Oh no.  Where is this story going?"  
    "Yep, a nose-less man," I continued.  
    "Like Voldemort?" the Hippie asked.  "How sad."
    "No."  I laughed.  "Just a kind man . . . with no nose 
. . . or nose holes.  Sure he could hear better than anyone.  He saw the details and beauty of flowers since he couldn't smell them.  But that poor man refused to be happy the way he was."
    "Yeah," the Scribe giggled.  "'Cause he didn't have a nose!  That would suck."
    Mr. P started laughing then, these huge laughs that made me giggle.
    After a moment, we all calmed down.  "Well, he prayed to God, and the Lord took pity on him.  He sent down a stork . . . who carried this sack from Heaven."
    "Don't storks normally carry babies?" the Scribe asked, always calling me on my crap.
    "Fine . . . it wasn't a stork . . . it was a duck!"  That was witty AND it fit perfectly.  "It was a fishducky who carried this sack from Heaven."
    I opened the sack and set the noses on the coffee table.  "Do you know why God sent the sack to the man?"
    They all shook their heads, everyone except Melynda who tried not laughing as she looked at the table.
    "He wanted to let the man pick his very own nose.  The only problem was . . . He sent animal noses!"
    The kids didn't laugh, they didn't even smile.  They were in awe.
    "Cool," Mr. P whispered. 
    "So, children!  Fishducky sent these noses today, and she said, 'Everyone pick your nose!'"
    They were so excited.  The oldest ones rushed to the table, but the Zombie Elf looked confused.  
    "What's wrong?" I asked him.  "Come on, buddy.  Come pick your nose."
    He stayed sitting on the couch.  I watched as his finger went closer to his nostril . . . closer and closer.  
    "No!"  Realization dawned on me.  "Pick THIS nose."  I pointed at the table, and after seeing the noses, he seemed so relieved.  
    The children hovered around, and we went youngest to oldest.      
    Here are the noses they picked:
    The kids had so much fun, that the Zombie Elf even hugged his trunk as he went to sleep.
    "Mom," the Hippie said, "I felt bad for the nose-less man, but now I think he was kind of lucky."
    "Why's that?" I asked.
    "Because it's fun trying on different noses."
    That night when my kids said their prayers, the Hippie said she's thankful for her face, the Scribe said she's thankful for Fishducky, and the Zombie Elf said he's thankful for elephants . . . And me, well, I'm thankful for my online family, because that's really what a lot of you have become.

    We had a ball.  This is a memory we'll never forget!
                                                                           (a duck in training)


  1. I'm still amazed by just how close I can feel to people that I've actually never met in person. Prior to blogging, I never would've thought that was possible.

  2. That's awesome. So funny.

  3. Dear Elisa,
    What a wonderful story of Fishducky's generosity, your storytelling, and the children's delight. Thanks for sharing the story and the photographs. I wonder where fishducky found those? Did she, perhaps, make them? She's one talented woman and could have done so.


  4. Fishducky is amazing! What an incredible memory! For not being a blogger, Fishducky sure does create quite a few blog posts! ;)

  5. Omg, that is so sweet!! Your fishducky is adorable. That is probably the best package you will ever receive...unless she tops herself.

    That pig nose and the elephant trunk are adorable!

  6. I love FISHDUCKY!!!!!! And your story was great. Only Fishducky would send those and then say "Pick your nose". Hail to Fishducky!!!! Our hero.

    Reminds me of a pencil sharpener I once had, it was a nose and you stuck the pencil in the nostril.

    And we are proud to be your online family.

  7. hahaha Fishducky sure went all plucky with that package. Just awesome looks like you had tons of fun and who knew a nose less man could be lucky.

  8. Fishducky is a rock star! I had a blast! What a fun box to get and what a memory! Thanks lady!

  9. Fishducky is epic! What'a pal! I personally want the bunny nose! Also, what adorable children you two have! :)

  10. Fran is becoming one of my favorite people, along with you, Melynda and all my other blogging friends. That was so sweet of her. She's one in a million. You guys looked so cute!

  11. No, I didn't make the noses--I bought them at a costume store. It looks like everyone enjoyed them as much as I'd hoped they would! I just wish I could have delivered them in person.

    When you come out this way to visit Cade's grandmother & stop in to see me (& I HOPE IT WILL BE SOON!!) bring (wear?) your noses. I have one, too. A ducky nose, of course--& a little fancier than yours, but then I AM the head ducky!

  12. This post just made my day. I had a really sucky day yesterday and today wasn't much better but this made me laugh. Thank you.

  13. PS--I LOVED The Zombie Elf's reaction. Please tell The Scribe I'm grateful for her--& all of you!

    That's so so so awesome. And your story of the noseless man = priceless.

    AND AND I got your book in the mail today! Merry Christmas to ME. For real, I'll be reading this on the subway on my 90 minute commute both ways in and out of the City TONIGHT!

    And I may be bad and read it while I'm supposed to be stage managing. The actors will be calling "Line" and I'll be giving lines from the book. I will confuse EVERYONE!

  15. Why does this not surprise me?
    I seriously love this story, Fishducky and all of you.
    The Internet does have its advantages and meeting all of you is the best one.
    Love the pics too!!!

  16. Twilight Zone, but better. ~Mary

  17. This was just so cute. Love fun posts like this.

  18. That was awesome! Although as soon as I read that the instructions said "Pick your noses!" I had a feeling that someone would actually stick a finger up a nostril :P Anyway, looks like it was a blast!

  19. That's the coolest thing ever! And I just love zombie elfs reaction. Priceless!

  20. Thank you for sharing this story I really enjoyed the story and pictures. You all look like you had fun.

  21. Great to hear about your connection Elisa. I have been surprised as well with the online connections that I have made.

    And of course, the nose photos are a hoot.

    I hope you have a nice Thanksgiving.

  22. Oh, Elisa! Not only was fishducky's gift a wonderful story on its own, you've taken it and enhanced it and made the whole occasion into something truly amazing and memorable! This post ought to be doing the rounds in cyberspace. It's the best feel-good story around! The pictures alone are absolutely priceless and I'm sure fishducky Fran is feeling an overwhelming sense of weepiness (joyful tears!) brought on by the knowledge of the impact her very thoughtful and loving gift had on all of you! Unless she is clairvoyant, I'm sure even she had not guessed quite how well-received that package would have been! I'm sure she's delighted! I'm sitting here, feeling all emotional and weepy myself! Big hug and Happy Thanksgiving!!! xoxo

  23. Stopping over from Craziness Abounds. That fishducky is an amazing woman. What a wonderful friend. I loved your story, and that you told everyone to pick their nose! (New follower!)

  24. I came over from Melynda's blog to check out the photos and wow don't you all look so cute and funny and I loved the story I think I will now follower you............

  25. Loved this...this is why it's so awesome to have extended family, on the internet =D

  26. Everyone is right...Fishducky is great and you're lucky to have her in your "online family" but I the luckiest one of all because she's my Mom and she'll always be my family!