Tuesday, January 17, 2012

A Memory

    My blog has been what my journal once was. It's amazing looking at old posts and reading what happened. There were so many things I'd forgotten from last year. I guess I was reminded of all of this because since my phone died, I had to use an old SIM card. It had numbers from people I don't talk to anymore. It was sad scanning through four names of people who have died.
   I thought of my grandma and her spunk, my grandpa and his kindness. I also thought of Cade's grandma as well as a good friend who have since passed. Somehow that made me start reading some of my first posts. It's fun looking at the past. But what it reminded me of even more, was a couple of years ago.
    Can you imagine a time so terrible, you've practically blocked it out? I had one such time. But I wrote everything down, and through those words, my memories lived. My friend encouraged me to read the journal. I sent her and my brother a new part of it each day.
    They both said they cried and laughed. I cried too, but what I found in those pages wasn't what I had expected. I didn't see so much pain, instead I saw hope, and a reason to forgive myself.
    It was like looking at my childhood, but finally seeing things as an adult would.  I'd done the best I could, and that was something to be proud of.
    My friend who read "The Golden Sky" first, wrote a post about it today. If you have a chance, here's the link to that story:

The Art Of A Memoir: The Golden Sky 

P. S. I hope you're having an amazing day. I'm still pretty sick, and I'm so sorry I haven't been able to read many blogs in the last few days. 

My mom came to help me yesterday and I slept from 8-5. Thank God for good moms.  Hopefully I'll be feeling better soon.  The Zombie Elf and Doctor Jones promised to help make some soup with me.  That should get us all feeling better super fast!


  1. I've blocked a lot of my childhood out, and recently I've been remembering it all.

    I'm sorry you're still sick. Feel better soon.

  2. I hope you feel better really soon. I'm sure Zombie Elf and Doctor Jones' soup will help with this process.

    Concentrate on getting well <3

  3. Feel better, chica!

    I've blocked out some of my child hood. Sometimes it's easier to forget things than have to deal with them. We all have those moments.

  4. I wouldn't mind blocking a good chunk of my childhood memories. Unfortunately my brain likes to keep them on file so as to torture me at inopportune times.

    I hope you feel better soon. 2 of my kids just got diagnosed with Strep, so I have a feeling it'll be my turn (again) soon enough.

  5. Feel better, love! Wish I could send you my cure all...matzo ball soup!!!!! Better than windex!
    I have a friend who blocked out a huge chunk of memories from his childhood and they've recently come back in very tough ways...I can't imagine going thru that. I'll read my blog from a few years ago and ask, "who was that girl?"...so glad I'm not there anymore.

  6. I hope you feel better. We are all battling a cold here too! It's amazing how life changes and when you grow up your views on what you thought you knew in the past changes.

  7. Was just thinking this last week, always interesting how we view things differently as we age, like the turning of a page. Hopefully those nasty germs go away soon.

  8. You are such an amazing writer.... I feel like this, too!

    I hope you're feeling better soon!

  9. Dear Elisa,
    All that seems important right now is for you to let your mom care for Zombie Elf and Doctor Jones while you sleep and rest and renew your energy and resilience. Taking care of yourself is a gift to your family.

    The review of your book was excellent. She truly caught the essence of the memoir you captured from your journals and papers about Zeke and Cade and you and that time in your life when your strength and the grace of Oneness pulled you into the person you are today. How blessed all of us are to know you.


  10. Still hoping you feel better soon, Elisa.
    I just read the "art of a memoir" post, and I couldn't agree more when she compares The Golden Sky to such classics as Anne Frank's Diary and Angela's Ashes.!

  11. I posted this on the "art of a memoir" blog--every word is true!

    This was a beautiful review of Elisa's journal--one of the most compelling books I have ever read. She made me cry, too--& LAUGH! Elisa may be young, but I believe she has an old soul. I am proud to call her my friend.

  12. Awesome post. Except for the part that says you're sick! Feel better soon.

  13. I actually have the opposite problem: probably the worst time of my life (if not that, than of my college life) refuses to leave my memory. No matter how much I want to forget it, I can't. What's worse is that I can't really talk about it because my mom (and I assume everyone else around me) doesn't want me to bring it up. So I just keep quiet about it.

    Again, I hope you feel better soon! Hopefully soup made with your toddlers will do help :)

  14. To followers of Stephanie's & Splitter's blogs (& a couple of others):

    Bloger must be mad at me. It won't let me read or post comments on those blogs. Please offer up something to the computer gods. I miss being able to comment--& I MISS YOU & YOUR COMMENTS!!

  15. I journaled the process of my divorce. In the end I had to throw them out because I didn't even recognize the person in the pages.

    It was very freeing to throw it all away.

    Feel better.

  16. Arghhhhh, feel better soooooonnnnnn!

  17. Boy, I wish I'd had a mom around when my kids were young -- for them, I mean. I'm sure another mom would have done a better job than I did. I'm very sorry you are ill. I have a high school reunion coming up later this year. I think it's the 35th. We have a reunion Facebook page that I glance at occasionally. I recognized very few of the names of the alumni until I looked at the list of the deceased. I knew a number of them. How did it turn out that the people I remember had died? It's sad.


  18. Gosh, feel better! Moms shouldn't get sick.

  19. I've been blogging for several years and going back over the old posts is like reading old journals.
    So sorry you're still feeling poorly. Hope tomorrow is a better day. :)

  20. Feel better soon E. I miss you

  21. 8-5? This explains why you wrote me back at 4am (my time).