Wednesday, August 3, 2011

When you least expect it . . .

    My kids have been back in school for just over a week and The Scribe is already having a hard time.  It's a heart breaker.                     
    Remember my blogs about the bully?

How to Beat a Bully

The Scribe Wasn't Kidding

Well, things have gotten hard again.  

  Note: I'm not a bully advocate, I just thought this was funnier than ketchup on a P B & J sandwich. 

    On Monday, The Scribe came home from school crying.  
    "She said all those means things again," The Scribe sobbed.  "She said our family is poor.  She called you stupid.  She said my little brother runs around naked."
    The Scribe was supposed to have a play date with a new girl in her class, but The Bully wouldn't have any of that.  She told the entire class terrible things about The Scribe and our family.  She said only losers hang out with The Scribe.  No one (not even the girl we'd planned a playdate with) wanted to play with The Scribe after that.
    So, at recess, a few kids surrounded my kid in the back field behind the portables.  The main bully (who used to be The Scribe's best friend) laughed and joked, saying how much they think The Scribe sucks.  
    I'd gotten my girl fancy clothes and hoped that would help give her confidence, but they were just clothes after all.
    The Scribe told me that when it happened, she didn't cry on the outside.  She said she acted tough even as she died inside.  "We don't want you going to lunch," The Bully said.  "If you show up in that lunch room, we'll make your life even worse.  We hate it when you're in the same room with us.  We hate it that you're in our cl . . . cl . . .   What's the rest of that word?"
    "Ass?" The Scribe asked and everyone screeched with laughter.
    "Hey, have you seen those glasses?"  It had turned out so well, The Bully became a repetitive meanie!  "If I say, gl . . .  gl . . .  What's the rest of that word?"
    (Later as The Scribe relayed this story, she explained that when you add an "S" to a bad word, it makes it even worse!  I put that in my pocketbook of useful facts--I never knew that.)
    So, back to the story, The Scribe stood as the other girls circled and laughed.  She was just about to give in and cry.  They'd tricked her into saying a bad word, then wanted her to say it again, BUT IN PLURAL FORM!
   She thought about how much she wanted lunch and the fact that the kids said she couldn't go eat.  She thought of everything and almost broke down.  That's when an angel walked from the baseball diamond to their left.
    Now this "Angel," is one of the most popular girls in the 4th grade.  She has light blonde hair.  She's tall and beautiful.  She commands respect.  And as she walked closer to the bullies everyone hushed.
    "It's Sarah," they said as if Aphrodite herself visited from Olympus.  "What's she doing here?" 

    Before I go on with this story, let me take you back several years, to when The Scribe started kindergarten.
    I'd pulled up to school pretty early.  I refused to let The Scribe go alone, so we went to the playground and she played before the bell rang.  A bunch of kids crowded into the play area.  Some were big, some small.  They all had an excitement for life that can't be bought.  
    I smiled at them, until I noticed one girl off by herself.  She had light blonde hair, like liquid gold.  She wore darling glasses, the kind that framed her eyes perfectly.  But even though tons of kids swarmed around, she seemed sad.  She had no friends.  
    I wanted to do something, say something.  But at that same instant, The Scribe must have noticed the girl too, because she moved from the group of kids she'd played with.  She went and played with the gorgeous girl, The Angel who hadn't made friends yet even though she'd be one of the most popular kids in 4th grade years later.  
    Her mother told me how much The Scribe's actions meant to her.  We actually became good friends.  "You did a good thing," I told The Scribe after school that day.
    "It's not a big deal," she'd said.  "She just needed a friend like everyone else." 
    So, that's why The Angel's actions meant so much to me on Monday.  Those bullies surrounded The Scribe.  They made her say class without the "cl!"  They said her little brother likes being naked! 
    The Angel walked over, pushed them aside and stood between them and my girl.  "Knock it off!" she yelled.  "I've been friends with The Scribe for years.  She's a nice kid and you need to leave her alone!"
    It makes me want to cry as I write this, because the main bully (let's call her "El Toro") looked at The Angel.  "NO one will want to be friends with you after this! No one!"
    "I don't care," The Angel said.  "I'd rather do what's right.  Once, a long time ago, The Scribe played with me when no one else would.  It meant a lot to me.  I'll do the same thing for her now."
     "Even if you lose all your other friends?" El Toro asked.
     "Even then."  Angel nodded.  She grabbed The Scribe's hand, squeezed it hard and they walked into the lunchroom together.  
    I went to school yesterday, just to check on The Scribe (when she didn't know I was there).  You know what I saw?  She sat on the grass, all alone with The Angel.  Those two bully-haters were grinning, having the best time ever and laughing up a storm.

    "She's an awesome girl," I told The Scribe last night.
    "You know," The Scribe said, "I never thought it was a big deal that I played with her in kindergarten, but now I understand.  When you don't have anyone, having a friend means even more than it normally does."
     "What are you gonna do about The Bully?" I asked.
    "I don't know," she shrugged, "but I did realize one thing.  Without her I wouldn't have gotten to be such good friends with The Angel again."
    So, The Scribe learned an important lesson.  Everything happens for a reason.  Bad can turn good, good can get better, and it can all happen when you least expect it.


  1. Goosebumps everywhere! Poor Scribe! It's wonderful that she learned such a great lesson but it doesn't make your heart break any less!

  2. Really, they already have school? That sucks.

  3. School starts early in your neck of the woods. I have a child roughly that age and am learning that little girls can be pretty catty. Oh and the little guy should run around naked all he wants. I have been a nudist all my life.

  4. I'm crying for Scribe.... poor thing.
    Want me to beat that bullys ass? I'll totally do it.

  5. I know exactly how the Scribe felt...aaaak! Kids can be so mean. Sounds like your Scribe is one strong kid with a lot of character. Good for her.

  6. I'm glad things turned out well. That is a really scary situation to be in as a little girl. Well as anyone really. I know I wouldn't want to be surrounded by a bunch of angry no-good bullies. Give her a hug for me!

  7. Poor Scribe!Kids are so mean!But it is good to hear that someone stood up for her.That is a true friend:)

  8. Your children have nothing to worry about because they have such an awesome mom to watch their backs. Bet the Bully can't say the same. A Bully learns from someone right?

  9. SIV MARIA is right. It hurts now, but The Scribe will have a happy, friend-full life because she knows how to be a good friend. I feel sorry for The Bully because I don't foresee the same future for her.

  10. i feel sorry and happy for The Scribe at the same time. It sucks that there are bullies in this world, but on the other side, bullies are what makes us stronger and better persons. So good luck for The Scribe. She's strong and she has wonderful family to back her up :)

  11. Awww. Poor Scribe. I wish people weren't so mean to her. I've always said be kind to everyone because you'll neverk now when you might need someone yourself! It looks as if the Scribe has learned that lesson, too! :) Your girls make me proud, and I'm not even their mother.

  12. Poor Scribe, kids are awful! I know first hand how shit it is, she's a stronger girl than I was! It's always great to have good friends

  13. My poor baby girl. I want to shove el torro's horn's up her buttocks. She is a class without the cl and her mom needs to be taken out onto the playground for encouraging her behavior. You tell the Scribe I'm proud of her and since I know miss Sarah I will have to agree that girl is a real sweet heart and always has been.

  14. You should ask Jamie about her experiences with bullies. She could really give you a great perspective. She's such a doll and it is hard to believe that anybody would want to bully her, but they did. Just like our poor little Scribe. It's hard to believe that anybody could be mean to her because she has the biggest heart for such a little girl.

  15. bullies are there everywhere!it really sucks!
    but eventually they will pay for what they do.thats a truth.
    thankyou so much for adding my blog:)
    good day!

  16. I'm scheduled to play the violin for The Scribe's class today. I hope it will go well ;)

    This year round school thing is crazy, but fun.

  17. I want to give The Scribe a big hug and then I want to do some sort of Hollywood movie switch thing and be a 4th grader again. I was one bad mamajamma back in the day and I spent pretty much every single day defending kids from bullies. There are some kids without front teeth or straight fingers because I did not like to 'use my words'. really.

  18. I've never been a mother, but from having friends who are children, Elisa, I can imagine what you must have felt like when the Scribe came home and told you these stories. Anger at the ignorance of El Toro. Gratitude for the Angel's graciousness. You must have wept inside both times. Have fortunate you and Scribe and your other three children are that you have one another.