I know it's sad, but I judge people. Hey, I'm stepping from the closet that holds those goody two-shoes, and I'm finally admitting my faults. I judge people by their cell phone pictures. It's like seeing a man who claims he's not married, but has a strong tan line on his left ring finger. Some things just tell all, and your main cell picture is one of those things.
If a person chooses a pet for their picture, you can assume one of four things, they either have no kids, just had a kid, have too many kids or don't have visiting rights.
If someone has a picture of their spouse, they've been married less than fifteen years (excluding year seven) or more than twenty years (excluding year twenty-five.) If you'd like to know why I've excluded certain years, get married and find out for yourself!
If you've chosen a picture of a stripper, you're a pervert who will probably never be in a relationship until you change your obvious love of sick things.
If you don't have a screen on your cell . . . you need a new phone (like this nice looking man).
If your picture is of a flower, landscape, seascape or beautiful night lights, although a nice default, you're either an awesome photographer, or may need to read your phone manual. I think that's a stock photo.
If you have a picture of a book on your phone, you're self published. (Good for you. I'm almost part of your club.)
If its of a ring, you need to date a guy who's willing to propose. And once again if you have a picture of a stripper . . . you might be a man who should propose!
If the picture's just of yourself, that's either narcissistic . . . or really artsy.
If it's of a stranger you saw somewhere, you need to quit stalking your prey!
If it's of a star, it better be Paul Newman or Steve McQueen.
If it's of an object or money, I hope it's something nice like a Harley or a Stradivarius.
And last of all, if it's of you and your friends, you're probably under thirty and a really great friend.
So, all that being said . . . Tell me what main picture you have on your phone. Tell me . . . if you dare.
Bwa Ha Haaaa!!!
Wanna know what my picture's of? It's of Cade because we're just at year ten. At year fifteen we'll either renew our vows, or I'll use a picture of my blog instead. Why? Because that's really artsy.