Sunday, March 27, 2011

Little Red Men With Pitchforks (Guest Blogger)

Hello this is Cade, Elisa's husband. She is sick with the flu, so she asked me if I would guest blog for her today. I wrote this story about twenty years ago. It's something I'd imagine would be in the comic section of a newspaper. Hope you enjoy it. 

       Little Red Men With Pitchforks
By: Cade


The little men in red pajamas ran around, scattering as I moved, sometimes poking me in the bottom with their glowing, red-hot pitch forks.  They stung like welding torches, lighting my clothes on fire.  As they poked at me, they herded me past red brimstone walls, toward a distant cliff. 

I tried kicking them, but they just got back up and poked me in the bottom again.  So, I ran as fast as I could until I came to the edge of the cliff.
As I turned, I saw one of them extending his pitchfork and charging right at me, so I moved to the side.  He ran right off the cliff.

"Wahoo," he screamed as he fell into the boiling lava at the bottom.  Poof!  He disappeared into a column of black smoke.

The others continued using their red-hot pitchforks to push me off the cliff.  I grabbed a pitchfork (ouch!) and flung another one off.  Poof!  Another column of black smoke.

Suddenly, as I looked away from the cliff, I saw two little red men pop out of different holes in the brimstone wall, bouncing on their little red bottoms.

"I wonder if they were the ones I saw go poof?" I thought.  "Maybe that's the way I can get around these little devils."

They kept poking at me, so I jumped off.  As I fell, I watched the lava come closer to my feet.  I felt the heat as it burned me up from head to toe, every little inch by every little inch.  Then, everything went numb.  Poof!

All of the sudden I swirled in a red, yellow and white tunnel, moving like a roller-coaster.  Pop!  Instantly, I fell from one of the holes in the brimstone walls and bounced on my little red bottom.  I looked down and saw I wore red pajamas and held a red-hot pitchfork!

"So that's where they come from," I exclaimed to myself.  "Oh well."  I joined the little red men, poking the giant man who was running from us.


  1. So sorry she is sick today. Tell her we hope she's better soon.
    As for your story, "Sometimes you get and sometimes you get got!"
    Thanks for writing her blog today!

  2. What a good husband you are Cade! Good story too. :)

  3. Cute story, have a great sunday :)Hope the Mrs. recovers soon.

  4. Who knew Cade.has a big imagination too lol. I'm sick n bed too. Fever nd such. Hope she gets better soon.

  5. I hope Elisa feels better soon, but it's sweet of you to post for her, Cade.
    Have a wonderful day.

  6. Who knew that's how those lil' red buggers came to be!
    What a perfect tale!

  7. Gee whiz! (did I just say that?) I wish my hubby would post for me when I'm down and out! Thanks Cade! I hope your feeling better Elisa!?

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