Sunday, December 9, 2012

That's bullsh*t: But the Truth Will Set You Free.

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Now, for today's post!
The Zombie Elf recently got several toys from Melynda at Crazy World.  She gave him rescue heroes: firefighters, space rangers, policemen, construction workers, all the characters from YMCA and much more!
    Well, my four-year-old zombie played with those toys for hours. I thought it was cute how the Zombie dubbed the construction worker as the leader, probably since Cade--his daddy--works construction. 
    I peeked around the corner when the toys got into a big fight with each other.
    The Zombie held them up, saying different things like, "No. No! The bad guy's over there."  "I know, he's hurting the Barbies." Or.  "You're wrong, he's after the My Little Ponies!"  
    "No . . . it's you," the Zombie finally said for a low-voiced toy--the menacing blue ninja.  "You've been after the My Little Ponies this whole time, Construction Guy. You already smacked all the Barbies and stole their dream car!"
    The Zombie grabbed the construction guy and made him lumber forward. "Stop it, Blue Ninja," the construction guy said. "That's BULLSHIT!"
    I paused.  Did the Zombie really swear?  And why had he used MY line?  Don't answer that.  So yesterday I told Cade that he swears too much because now the kids are grabbing construction toys and saying a bunch of B.S.  
    "I don't swear too much.  DAMN it!" Cade said, thoughtfully.
    "And that just proves it."  I giggled.  (Please remember this is my honest point of view, completely unbiased, sweet, kind and wonderful like all good mothers POV's are!)
    "But I'm not the one who says, 'That's bullshit'.  Elisa, that's something you say."
    He'd put me in a tough spot.  I thought of my potty mouth.  I don't swear a lot, just when I'm really mad, tired, or awake.  I yawned widely, exaggerating to buy time, then turned to Cade, batted my lashes and said, "Dear, swearing Cade.  The Zombie picked up a CONSTRUCTION WORKER and said the swear word!  YOU'RE a construction worker.  The Zombie didn't pick up House Wife Barbie and say, 'Damn it all!' He picked up a construction worker like you!"
    "And you're comparing yourself to House Wife Barbie?"
    "If the shoe fits.  Why what toy would you compare me to?"
    He shook his head because apparently he couldn't think of something that wouldn't be misconstrued.  "Well, da--ng it," Cade said.  "I'll try better."
    "I hope so."  I kissed him on the cheek.  "That bullshit needs to stop."    

   Today is day 9 of remembering being homeless in Hawaii.  My memory for today is that the Truth will always set you free.
    In closing:  If you could be any toy, what would you want to be?
    I'd want to be Rainbow Brite.


  1. I'm not sure--do they make a toy that just sleeps & goes out to dinner?

  2. I have no idea. But I'll tell you that I would no like to be the dog that you feed and it poops. Evidently it's a game of sorts. WTH? What idiot came up with THAT and decided it was a good marketing TONY for kids?

    Now that's Bullsh*t. :)

  3. Me, I'd be one of the Dinobots, but I'm weird that way.

    But anyway, that's OK. My autistic 11 yr old had a bit of a meltdown this weekend. We had promised to take him to a local breakfast with Santa Claus, but things got busy and we missed it. Anyway, I've been letting him type on my ipad a bit lately because he decided he wanted to write a book. Well yesterday he wanted to put some work into this book. I let him on. A few minutes later I walked past, looked over his shoulder and saw "F*** YOU DAD!" (but minus the *'s). Guess he was kind of miffed about the whole missing Santa thing.

    I will say this, though, kids get the usage of a lot of words wrong but they almost *always* seem to get the bad ones right. :)

  4. hahaha so fun watching them go at and seeing what they come up with, even if they steal your errr um Cade's bad words. Hmmm I'd have to go with ninja turtle.

  5. I want to be a Transformer -- more than meets the eye.


  6. Super Lawyers is just that - a title - that could be given to any one being refered to by people who knew them or they knew those people. Nothing special in there.
    Attorney Macon