Wednesday, February 24, 2016

I'm on a freakin' rollercoaster -- my surgery is tomorrow

You know that crazy ride at the amusement park--the really old one no one wants to ride?  It's so rickety that it's not even fun-scary, it's ACTUALLY scary.  Hell, a kid died on it last spring--but that fun-fact was hushed by the mob.
    Well, I feel like I'm just about to get on that stupid ride, only I don't wanna! *stamping my foot*  I'm strapped into the cracked leather seat. The wooden tracks are creaking. I know I'm gonna be okay, but I'm still worried I might die--like that kid last spring.
    Okay, so I'm being a tad dramatic, but you see where I'm going with this.  I'm a pansy and I know it. P.S. When I wrote that last bit, I was singing I'M A PANSY AND I KNOW IT.
    So, my surgery is tomorrow.  My blood test came back great, showing no precursors for cancer. And I felt awesome--like a pig in poop--until talking to the pre-surg nurse. The surgery will take a little bit longer than normal since my tumor is growing into my intestine.  JUICY.... Yes, if one MUST have a tumor, why not have it attach itself to your intestine--just for funsies. Also, they can't rule out cancer until they send the tumor to the lab.
    I signed some paperwork saying if they need to take out more than my tumor and ovary that Mike can give verbal consent.  THAT is terrifying. I hope Mike loves me, really I do.
    Yesterday I asked Mike, "So if they come out and say the tumor looks cancerous and other things look suspicious, will you tell them to remove whatever looks suspicious?" 
    "Nope," he said, "because I don't know what you'd want. I'd let you decide later."
     #1 WHAT!  
     #2 DOUBLE WHAT?
    It's great that we're having this conversation BEFORE the surgery 'cause I don't want anything that looks cancerous to remain housed in my freakin' body--that's what.
    Anyway, after work I get to see my father-in-law and mother-in-law.  They're AMAZING--coming from another state to help me and everything. I love them, really.
    Oh and in other notes, I talked to one of my favorite people ever. I'm going to see her in Missouri in a month. She's concerned that I shouldn't go, so I set that woman straight.  "My uterus might not be able to make it, but I'll still be there!"
                                                                   Peace Out!
    I might blog before going to surgery tomorrow, but only if I'm desperate for comfort.  Otherwise, Mike will post something (hopefully insanely witty and sweet) to let you know what's what.