Life has a way of changing when we least expect it, whether it’s a divorce, a wedding, a medical diagnosis, or just one of those seasons when everything feels different. Challenges can seem daunting and feel isolating at times. Lately, though, I’ve been reflecting on something my grandma used to say: “Friendships and families are what brighten the world.” I didn’t fully grasp the depth of that as a kid, but going through hardships as an adult has solidified her words for me.
Take my friend, Kara, for instance….
We first met years ago while both navigating the aftermath of divorce, trying to find a new life as single mothers. Back then, our therapy was taking long walks together, covering miles while venting about everything under the sun. Those walks became my lifeline. I remember once trying to surprise her with a trip to a “special spot” to lift her spirits. Kara somehow assumed we were headed to a five-star restaurant; she showed up in a gorgeous dress and four-inch sparkly stiletto heels. So, I changed to also dress up, and led her straight to my “favorite spot”—which wasn't a restaurant, but was a fishing pond!
We spent the afternoon howling with laughter as our heels sank and slipped in one section, but we held each other up, just like we have metaphorically throughout life. The whole thing seemed hilarious, ridiculous, and unconventional, but it’s a memory that still makes both of us smile.
Years later, as I’ve been fighting cancer, Kara has been right here to support me. She even brought me to treatments last week where doctors said I have to get another spinal surgery.
I could’ve started crying at one point, but Kara, not realizing, said something so silly at that exact moment that I couldn’t help laughing. This reminded me of another lesson: We can sit and wallow—it'd be so easy to give up and let the sadness move in and take up residence—but sometimes you have to actively SEARCH for the light, letting people in when it might be easier to build a wall around your life.
My grandma was right. If you’re going through a hardships, don’t isolate yourself. Maybe it's time to try leaning on your family, reaching out to a friend, or meeting somebody new. I just hope you’ll remember that you don’t have to carry the burden all by yourself. You never know what blessing is waiting.
Yes, life can be hard, but it's in the darkness when the light can shine the brightest.
Honestly, I’m really nervous about my upcoming surgery, but I’m grateful for the wonderful people in my life. And with them around me and my family, I know we’ll somehow make it through.
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